Wednesday, December 22, 2010

Get an Idea

Me : Hi Abhishek
AB : Hi Kislay
Me : Say, I watched your latest flick (KHJJS) , and I was a little disappointed .
AB : Any idea why ?
Me : Ha ! Plenty . I could not make my peace with the over benaglification of words . I could not understand why the romantic twist had to be added . And once I picked up the book, Do and die, your entire character , with whom I was not totally convinced to begin with, fell apart.
AB : *sheepish*
Me : Never mind . How is the Big B ?
AB : He is fine
Me : I hope Mrs. Jaya and Mrs. Ash are well too.
AB : They are , thanks for asking .
Me : If you don't mind, I had a rather impertinent question to ask of you .
AB : Go ahead 
Me : Would you agree that your father is a Legend ?
AB : Yeah . Duh . What kind of a question is that ?
Me : Pardon me . Would you agree that even your mother kicked serious ass when it came to acting ?
AB : Of course . She rocked .
Me : And your wife, the wondrous Miss Aishwarya has also established herself as quite an actress , right ?
AB : What do you mean by "established herself" ?
Me : Well, she was a model. No offence intended but it did take her a while to get the hang of it. Even though I don't like the way she giggles , I think she can be counted as an actress now.
AB : *Looking a little worked up, grunts* Hmmm
Me : Please, I beg your forgiveness, I did not mean to hurt your feelings, and I did point out that the question was impertinent . 
AB : *Sighing impatiently* But what the hell is the Question ? You have asked 3 so far . And you already had the answers .
KC : Well....., Hmmm...... , how do I put it ? Ahem ......... Okay ..... Do you have any idea why 3 out of the 4 members of your happy family consists of 2 great and 1 good actors? Do you have any idea about why they are able to convince the audience ? I mean, do you know why they click as actors ?
AB : *With the contorted facial expression of I-am-trying-to-solve-a-partial-differentiation-equation-in-my-head *

17 minutes later

Me :Well ?
AB : Errr....... Hmmmmm ....... This one is a thinker. What makes an actor click ?
Me : If I wanted to know what made an actor click , I would have gone to FTII Pune. Tell me why do your parents and wife click ?
AB : * After scratching his head for a while* I am not saying this is my final answer, though it would have helped if this question could be rephrased in the form of an MCQ .........
Me : Whoa . Whoa . Dude . KBC is over . Relax , huh ? Give me it .

13 minutes later

AB : *Dejectedly* No idea
Me : *With jaws dropping and eyes popping* Really ? NO IDEA ! NO BLOODY IDEA ! WTF ! I will be damned !
AB :Eh ?
Me : Cheerio ! * And starts exiting cautiously , while AB is back in regurgitation mode*

A few minutes later, I heard the shouts of AB, in indignation, imploring me to come back, shaking his fists in the air. "Run faster" , was the Idea that my brain came up with. And I did.

p.s. Totally fictitious, a figment of my twisted imagination. Do I even have to say that ? And just in case somebody did not notice, it is partially inspired by the latest Idea ad campaign in which AB is asking everyone to "Get Idea" . 

Wednesday, December 8, 2010

Ghost of a Dead Belief

I Believed .
Those Beliefs are now swimming in front of my eyes.
Dripping in blood.
Their heads hacked off.
For a while I thought it was over.
And off I went, to cremate my dead belief.
There were others there too.
Like me and unlike me.
Friends and foes.
They are burning, faces in fire,
Melting, losing shape,
Consumed, but not purged,
It is strange.
The Beliefs were all colored.
But the ashes , an indifferent gray.
With the dying embers, I said a prayer,
"May its soul rest in peace",
But I had burnt the soul a long time before.
With this thought in my mind,
I made my way out,
Out of heaven's doors.
What I didn't notice, was the Ghost.
Following me, was the Ghost of my dear old friend !

By Stuti Chandra

This is a poem by my sister, who blogs here.

Wednesday, November 24, 2010

Humara Nayak Nitish

Humara Nayak jeet gaya.

Our hero won. I am not sure about this claim of mine, but I think he won like no one has ever before. I , like millions of other Indians, am ecstatic. I say Indians, and not Biharis, for I truly believe that his Victory is not only hailed by the Indians from Bihar, but from all over India. For a change, the right man won, for the right reasons and at the right time [ Don't misinterpret the use of the word right here ;) ] . For me, it is akin to the Victory of Good over Evil,  like the radiant and resplendent Sun dispelling the clouds of darkness and doom. It is as if our Nayak borrowed Shri Ram’s bow, and chopped off not ten, but multi-headed Raavan’s in Bihar. I see the hand of the Divine Mother, blessing our Nayak with her Shakti, to gore all the Mahishasur’s to death. The Raavan’s are still there, fewer in number though, the Mahishasur’s have not been annihilated to oblivion, but the Battle is on, and you know who is gaining. It feels like Holi, Dusshera and Diwali, all rolled into one. You can say that today, I am on cloud nine, with a rainbow around my shoulders.

One might wonder that what is the big deal about Nitish jee’s re-election. He won in 2005 with a good majority, didn’t he? He worked for the development of the State, didn’t he? Logically speaking, he would have won anyways. And that is where being a Bihari, and having lived in the Dark Ages, gives you the insight that how Logic and Reason had been condemned to hell for 15 years. Unless, you have seen it, heard about it, and experienced it from a close range, you cannot imagine the fear that gripped us all. The perpetual state of disarray that we all lived in, the despair and gloom that had become a part of Life, the notion that one had to leave this damned state for a better Life, and the further you went, the better it was. 

When he held the reins in 2005, it was the proverbial sliver lining. But that fear did not go away completely even when he came into Power. Every now and then, the dark thought of his losing in the upcoming elections troubled me. An irrational fear, that nothing good can ever happen in Bihar, that we are doomed forever, that no matter what, the Dark forces will employ diabolical means to usurp power once again. I wonder whether there are others who thought on the same lines, but I had this nagging doubt. It always lurked in my mind, and sent shivers down my spine. Today, his victory has brought with it, the hope and promise for a change that will be lasting and persistent. The landslide is like the proverbial nail in the coffin of the Lords of Misrule. This victory is also a sign of a desperately needed Social change. A change in the mindset of the populace, to rise above caste and religion, to value development and peace over anything else. I do not claim that Biharis are done with caste and religion, or that this change will take place overnight. It a long and arduous process. But with Nitish jee as the Captain, the ship will sail through, and be a shining example of a Nav Bharat.

Our Nayak was not backed by MY or Your people. He was backed by the forward and the backward, by the Hindus and the Muslims, by the hope and trust of the once doomed, who now have a chance to experience Progress for a considerable period.

Today is a great day for India, and for our democratic system. This victory, and the previous one, are in the annals now, and they will be quoted as an example of a turnaround for many years to come. When a state as large and populous as Bihar gets a push in the right direction, it cannot just benefit the people from that state alone. I am no social scientist or a student of economics, but yet, I know and I am so sure of this belief, that the benefits reaped off from the leadership of our Nayak, will affect a lot more people than the 10 crore Biharis.

As Bob Dylan said, the times, they are indeed a changing.

Jai Hind.  

p.s. Did any one of you laugh out loud when the Gandhi clan tried hard to impress the Junta, and claim that there has been no development in Bihar, completely ignoring the fact that it was their beloved ally who was responsible for that?

Friday, November 12, 2010

The Might of the X Chromosome

As most you already know, it takes a X and a Y chromosome to be a guy, and 2 X's to be a gal. Now, this Y chromosome has received much more than its share of attention , and its demand has shot so much in our country , that it led to a pre-premature demise of 5 million girls , and though not as many but quite a few mothers as well . There was a time when the Mother was blamed for giving birth to a daughter, people being completely oblivious of the Male's contribution in the form of a Y chromosome . Well, maybe people know a little more than before now, but I bet most of them don't know the following :-

1. The default gender setting for a child is to be a girl. The Y chromosome acts as a trigger to switch the gender. So all MCP's and men-who-think-women-are-inferior, you were all set to be a girl but for the Y .

2. The X chromosome has about 1200 to 1500 genes . Guess how many genes does the Y have ? Only 100 , and the number is going down .

3. The X chromosome encodes the information for about 1200 different proteins . The majority of these protein sequences are involved in brain development and adult brain function . If this does not make you bow before the Mighty X, then what will ? If it were not for your mommy, you would be blithering dithering idiot ! :D

4. Males are a lot more vulnerable to being mental ( for quite a few mental disorders) , as compared to females because while men have only one X , women have a backup . So if you thought being a guy was all fun and games, think again, for there might come a day when you wouldn't be able to think straight . ;)

In my opinion, the above mentioned facts conclusively prove the might of the X . :) And God save the Y chromosome, the poor thing is dropping genes , thanks to some rapid evolution , that it just might disappear one fine day . I bet that would make a lot of women happy . :D

p.s. My source : Brain Rules by Dr. John Medina . A really great read, if you want to know about how does your brain work , and how can you make it more productive and efficient . And anyone with a basic knowledge of Biology can read and understand it . 

Thursday, May 6, 2010

My Dear Women

What comes to your mind, when the first thing you read in the morning is about a padeophile who got away? Or when you read gruesome headlines like “ 7 year old girl raped and killed” . 7 year old ? Raped and Killed ? What the FUCK ? What the FUCK is wrong with a society where children , innocent, divine, pristine, and unspoilt, get raped and killed !

From the very day a woman comes to existence, as a being on this Earth, she is the target, assaulted at every stage of her life. From female infanticides, to being raped and killed, no matter how old or young she is. Whether she flaunts her gifts in a bikni or gracefully covers herself with a hijab, whether she wears a saree, salwar,skirt or shorts, no matter what, why or when, she gets hit. The sickness of men when it comes to sharing the Planet with Women is universal , and manifests in many many cruel ways . They are mostly animals, or animalistic at times, at best.

Leave alone Rape and Murder. They are the end of the spectrum. What about being sacrificed for the sake of a mythical honour, being burned for dowry, being abused by the husband, exploited at the Workplace, sold in the market place, molested in a crowded space? What about the myriad other ways, in which, We, men , in general, make things difficult for them?

This huge gap, between the socio-economic status of men and women, will it ever be bridged by Reservations alone? I don’t think so. And neither can we bridge it by special favours and treatments to a few . You think, just because you don’t see it happening around you or with you, the times have changed, and women now walk along men, shoulder to shoulder? If you do, then you are among the lucky few in India for sure. I cannot say what happens in the Western countries for sure .

And to top this fine fettle of affairs, the Media has descended upon Womenkind, as a eco-friendly fossil-free resource, to be used anywhere, and in any way possible to maximize profits. No, it is not just pronography. Pornography is very direct. It is very blunt . What I am talking about, is the multitude of advertisements, that perpetually drive home the insidious message that if you use :-

My Deoderant -> All the Women for You
My Hair Oil -> Hot wife for you
My Cement -> More women . I don’t know how, but more women for you.
My underwear -> A hot woman for you
My pen -> A hot teacher will fall for you
My Car/Watch/Laptop/Mobile/Analgesic/Soda/Umbrell/God-knows-what-else -> Woman, in every nook and corner for you

And I am not counting the tv-shows and cinema.

So what message do I get , on a subconscious level? And why would would I need so many physically beautiful women? Ergo, a woman is an object, to be enjoyed and collected, if possible. And this message is put forward, 24/7.

I can’t understand the way this society wants to function. It is at odds with it self .

It seems to me, that they are trying to go by the following :-

1. I am a Man. I rock. Even if I don’t, let me reiterate. I am a MAN. I rule.
2. I want to sleep with as many women as possible. From my teenage.
3. It is my birthright to molest, eve-tease,grope etc., any woman that dares to step outside.
4. If any other man does the same to my mother or sister, all hell will break lose.
5. When I marry, I want a hot wife who cooks,cleans and bears my child.
6. I want to be paid a certain amount for my masculinity , and the huge responsibility I take on my shoulders, to feed and protect your daughter. ( I forget at times, that I also get a wife, and the mother of my children)
7. If the hot-wife is an only child, I would be very happy. I don’t want her brothers to share her fortune. My fortune is mine. Her fortune is mine as well.
8. My wife should be a virgin, when I marry her.
9. I should have robbed at least one girl of her virginity before I get married.
10. My wife should not ever betray me.
11. I may sometimes sleep around, just to recreate myself.
12. My wife should respect every memeber of my family, no matter how they treat her.
13. Of all the children 50% or more should be sons.
14. If all the children turn out to be sons, I will reward my wife appropriately( depends on the build,complexion, health of the son, and what he becomes) over her remaining less torturous life.
15. If all are daughters, then all hell will break lose.
16. I may decide to kill some of my daughters, even if I dont have many of them, at times. I may kill them at birth, forcefully marry them off anytime I want, virtually killing them, or may kill them if they marry against my divine wish.
17. I may be upsetting the sex-ratio, but fuck that, my honour comes first.
18. Another source of my beatific honour is the possession of sons with beautiful wives.
19. I am extremely aginst homo-sexuality of any kind. Homosexuality of the feminine kind can be condoned provided I am entertained by it.
20. Coming back to my wife, she should take care of all my children. Sons can hang out with me.
21. All my sons, should get ample opprotunity to play with as many other girls as they want.
22. Any woman , my son marries, should be pure, as was mine, and should not have had any affairs prior to the marriage.
23. It is the fundamental duty of the father-in-law of son’s, to pay me back with interest, all money that I ever spent on him. But he does not get my son for it.
24. If my wife or daughter should get raped, I will first try and rule out whether she asked for it.
25. If any family member does that, I may punish, my wife/daughter, depending on what I think happened.
26. My wife/daughters should not step outside, without my direct permission.
27. I want a certain percentage of the women, to be set aside, for my , and my fellow-men’s recreation. These women, will be treated the worst of all, because of what they practice. The sleep with men, for money.
28. There are a few, amongst, many other things that I want from Women. The others escape my mind. So to simplify things, I have the right to impose any rule I like, from flattening breasts to inspecting wheter women are wearing bras or not. So please co-operate. Or else, you know.

Now , you tell me, how the hell will a society be sane, given even half of the above rules are true. Men try to tilt eveyrthing in their favour to such a crazy extent, that things are way out of balance. But we never see the root cause. We suffer, and make women suffer even more. When we don’t get our sons,we kill them. When our sexually frustrated sons, as a result of the disturbing ratio, rape or attack other women, whom do we blame ? Even when we have paedophiles creeping out of many corners, we refuse to find out, why ?

We choose to ignore all of it. Because we are men. We want women to serve us. Till the day we end up killing all of mankind, and all other women and children.

Saturday, March 13, 2010

Kislay Calling Kislay

Hi Kislay ,

This is Kislay . You might think 0f it as weird , that Kislay is calling you . And why ? Because aren't you Kislay ? So who the hell is this other Kislay . Well , you know what Quantum Mechanics says , that The Universe is one GOOGLE-ish number of possibilities , and I am one just one of them . To simplify things , you may assume that you chanced upon a futuristic time capsule . Anyways , here is the story .

If you continue doing what you are doing right now , then in some time you are going to end up in a Big Reality TV Show . You know , where in order to achieve the Honour of being the 'Hapest Aind Hapining' , you will have to make 3 pairs of shoes of crocodile leather by hunting 7 ferocious crocodiles , win over Laetitia Casta and Monica Bellucci as well , become the President of your dumb ass Housing Society , Do an Item Number with 6 pack FLABS , Act in a Saas Bahu soap for 7 days ( more than that would critically devastate your psyche , 1 month would wipe the very trace of an alert and aware Consciousness from you , Beware ) , And yes , the one of the prime importance , swear as much as you can , that your words are basically construed as one incoherent string of bleeps and bloops . Kind of like , Bleep bleep is such a bleeping bleepy bleep , by Bleep ! Bleep ! Bleep ! :D

And by the way , you will also change your fairness cream . For nowadays , the World and their husbands including grand parents and children , they all bleeping bleep use , the Plasma of Life . This is not your ordinary , two bit , mutation inducing cream , that will alter your genes to become a Melanine free cancer prone version of a Caucasian in just 93.62 bleeping hours ( Not that all Caucasians are cancer prone ) , but it is one which even God uses while he goes tanning( Essentially proving that God is white , ergo he needs a fashionable tan :P ) . It is a God Tanned Cream ! More about it later .

And yes, you will also start dressing like an English Man . For Bhura Indian Research Institute has just declared , breaking news style , that for the diverse Indian weather , the only one complete range of suitable apparel for it is what the English wear ( Technically , any white person would do ) . So get your homburg and tweed and Italian hand crafted shoes ready chappie , jaldi karo .

And one very very important thing . Now you are no longer single . Well , actually you our are not even a couple dude , or a triple , or any number in the vicinity , for your life changed . You are the proud Master of some 7272 women . And all of that happened when you started using Axe , wearing Armani , applying Fair and Handsome , brushing your teeth using Close Up , painting your house with Asian Paint , wearing Macro Man's , using Naughty Rabbit shaving foam, and finally , when you built your home using a bleeping HDFC home loan , with, JK Cement . This became possible through the boundless efforts of Biologists and Statisticians , who conclusively proved that Men think the best , when their blood is somewhere else , which inspired diabolically Genius Marketing Executives to come with all these awe inspiring sex life changing products ( in some cases , they alter sexual preferences ) . Therefore , all men now have not even an iota of any inhibition , run after beautiful women/men all the time . Ah , Finally simpler times . :) My Male Chest is Puffed , with pride . :)

So you understand Kislay , that if you continue to be the over thinking over analysing , as Tool says , and a fool of the first water , as Wodehouse very nicely puts , the future holds all these nice things for you . And listen you nincompoop . I can't get to you if you don't use Vodafone , I don't trust the others . And if possible , use a mid-to-high end Nokia set with 3 G and Wire Less capability . It puts a lot less strain on me , considering that I am a kind of an astral being mate . So take a chill pill , ok ?

And one very important last thing . Sorry for dragging it on yaar . You absolutely must give up Mik and Milk Products , and live soley on Diet Soda and TGIF Cocktails . All that paneer, milk , cheese , curd and shakes your fat behind and rotund tummy feasted on has made me Lactose Intolerant . It is against the law now to break wind , neither in public , nor in private , thanks to exceptional sociological and sociopathic brilliance of the Indian Moral Police Force . Seriously , Kislay , you need to get a grip on just this one tiny little problem of yours . The rest is a smooth sail . And btw , don't squeal it to your room mate .

So do as I say . I will be calling regularly to check on you . Pay your bleep-damned bleeping bills on time .


Kislay ( v4.22+e26FF )

Saturday, March 6, 2010

The Atheist , The Man of God and the God Man

The very concept of God is so overly anthropomorphized, that some of the mentally strongest, the most intelligent, and the most rational of our species ends up disbelieving in it. I think that this anthropomorphizing stems out of a very human urge, to see God as a human, with superhuman abilities, all stemming out of the belief that “God made Man in his image”. So if any other species apart from human were to develop a brain sizeable enough to interpret divinity, will they perceive God as some sort of a super-animal ? I am not kidding at all , that was a very serious question . Say , if Lions had an average IQ of a human , will their society depict God as a Mega Lion ?

The very existence of light, gravity and matter, and the universe which encompasses it all cannot be denied. And neither can the existence of the source or rather the origin of all energy, whose different manifestations are absorbed by all our senses. If some us fail to see God, in all likelihood the cause could be those who try to force their knowledge upon us. If someone is an atheist, maybe he is so because all his life so far, he has seen it as nothing but an evil influence, either directly or indirectly , the greatest excuse ever to shed blood . If an atheist defies religion and God, then those who don’t must acknowledge, that is takes courage to go against a prevalent and widespread social belief and custom and considerable mental verbosity to proclaim your iconoclastic beliefs.

Let's say an atheist was explained Life , Evolution , The Universe , the Big Bang and the concept of Consciousness in as a scientific manner as possible . And then, he is told that there is a theory which points towards a common factor binding it all together. Something on the lines of the Unified Field Theory. And we call it the G.O.D. factor. What will he believe then ? And what will he challenge ?

The following is a comment left on one excellent post by Chrysalis by a close friend of mine, Dj.

“Amazing post....very rationally written! Could'nt have agreed more wth u..... i guess there are very few existing on this planet in the present "kali yug” who truly understand the notion of "I" and "GOD", and you sure r one of them.

I too was born in a religious family, on occasions over religious. Could never grasp the rationality of pomp and meaningless rituals, hence almost turned atheist. But whatever Vedic texts, quantum physics I have read and blogs like this one draw me back to the concept of "I" and "God". Would love to read another such post on these lines. Please keep writing.”

As Dj says, he almost turned an atheist. And why? Because it was expected of him, to believe in the notion of God and practice his religion, on its face value, to synchronize himself with it , just for the sake of it . But the scientist in him could not let him go astray, he almost rejected it. It was only when he started discovering the spiritual aspects of it, he moved further towards it. He is trying to understand God through Quantum Physics, Vedas and Rationality. Whether he fails or succeeds is immaterial because the path he is treading on is right. That is what religion, “the way to the Almighty”, is , and should be according to me . Dogmas, Rituals and vengeful Personal Gods is what it has been reduced to . From Millitant GodMen , to Proselytizing GodMen , with the Horny & Profiteering GodMen thrown in the middle. My usual angry self, lets out a disgruntled sigh every now and then, at the religion coated bull shit thrown in my face. But more than that, what hurts is that why does no University have a course on becoming a successful GodMan.

These are the visible flaws of Religion. Leave alone the fact whether God exists or not for a moment. As I said earlier, if you just consider the amount of blood that has been shed in the name of God, don't you think many sane, rational, and good people will become atheistic?

One last thing that DJ said, an experiment he proposed years ago from now , back in the Golden Days. The idea is to raise a child in an environment where he is not subjected to the notions of theism or atheism. No mention of the existence or absence of God at all. And then you wait, to find out whether this child does ever go down that road? Does he ever ask those impertinent questions? The experiment bears a stark resemblance to The Truman Show.And it would a cruel experiment to carry out.

The most irritating and intolerant aspect of this rigmarole is the ceaseless arguments, bickering, fights and bloodbaths, over convincing each other of the existence of our own personal Gods, our different versions of him. The most exasperating part is the need to get acknowledgement for our own beliefs from people, who may think or perceive very differently, and so, would obviously misconstrue or not construe at all , of what we do. It is like an Arab fighting with a Hindu, where the Arab is willing to behead the other, and the Hindu eager to burn him alive, for what the Arab calls “aab” is referred to as “jal” by the Hindu, and the two are completely oblivious of the fact that no matter what you call it or how you see it, it is Water.

I have come across quite a few communities in Orkut, where there is an ongoing war-of-the-word between theists and atheists. I have seen some of these battles take place on the blogosphere as well. And I try to stay away from them now, for neither will my arguments serve any purpose, neither will I change my belief system. Change is brought about by self realization, and everything else can be nothing but a catalyst or an influential agent. The manner in which members of both the schools of thought, keep trying to convince the other about their misconceptions, would shame the most passionate of all zealots.

So you believe in God, or you don’t. Cogitate, contemplate, debate, retrospect and introspect! Make your decision, and please live with it in peace. But why force your belief down somebody else’s throat. What I fail to understand is that why can't it be left to me and me alone to decide whether I bow before a God or not. I like most devout Hindus do bow before an Idol out of reverence, love, awe and sometimes fear. As a child, the Holy Trinity of Brahma, Vishnu and Mahesh were super men who created, preserved and destroyed. The Mother Goddess was a fiery and ferocious, yet a very loving and nurturing mother, all of humanity being her children. As an adult, I sometimes feel that the Holy Trinity is nothing but the process of creation, preservation and destruction, the source of those fundamental processes . The Mother as once pregnant with the seed of the life, the point of singularity for the Big Bang, and nurturing the Universe since its conception . I believe so, because of the way I was raised. And I do not think it has impaired my judgment or reasoning.

As I developed my own thought process, I have questioned my own beliefs, tested them, and drew my own conclusions. And this process of design, development and testing is an ongoing one, and never shall it cease, even if I come to disbelieve. I am not inspired by the way I practice my faith to kill, rape, murder or maim. If, I am vengeful or murderous, if I harbor hatred and negative sentiments for my fellow beings , it is more due to the shortcomings in me as a human and a man, rather than the work of the Big Guy. For I am the product of my own deeds, my very own actions have shaped my character, my life and destiny.

Now it won't make much of a difference if I perceive that God as personal or impersonal, whether I envision Him as the expanding and contracting Universe or just a scintillating source of light. I do NOT like being labeled delusional. And as far as evidence or proof of the existence of God is concerned, does the absence of evidence imply the evidence of absence? It is positively insulting to be told that my belief in a higher power suggests that I have a closed mind. That function is governed by weltanschauung of the individual. Freedom to Believe in God or Not is one of the most fundamental of all liberties, and it should be treated like one. As I see it, the myriad schools of thought in this World pertaining to the matters of existence and/or absence of God, could be envisioned as lenses of different tints and hues, and nature, convex, concave, spherical or cylindrical. Light cannot be but seen in different ways through them.

I, for one, believe that no faith is totally good or bad as such. Using the water example here again, religion like water is tasteless, colourless and odourless. So it is the followers who spice it up, aggrandize it, embellish it appeal to their own taste buds, sometimes so, that it doesn’t appeal to the other fool.

"Religion is the opium of the masses”. And how do most drug addicts end up ?

Coming back to atheism, I truly and sincerely respect some of them. If I dislike a few, it is because they are no different from a religious fanatic, perpetually busy shredding every damn thing that Religion touches or inspires. I hope the Atheistic movement does not become another Organized Religion without a God. I fervently hope that the day never comes, when they too become one of the enemies of Humanity, not unlike the many religious extremists plaguing the Planet right now. The intelligent indifference of Atheism should never become the murderous zeal of a Fanatic.

To Believe or Not to Believe, is a very personal and individual choice. You have the right to shred, demolish and question my belief system, but no right to judge or annihilate me for being an adherent, provided it is not the direct or indirect agent of death, destruction and chaos.

A theist and an atheist, once saw the glimpse of entire universe, in its enormity and magnificence, and were awed beyond expression by it. The theist yelped, “Oh My God! This is Him!” The theist interjected in an equally wondrous, yet a slightly rational tone, “No, my good man. That is nothing but the Universe. And it is incredible.”

P.S. : Why the hell did I not think of becoming a God Man ? It hurts to realize that I will have to start as a novice in this Industry , and then gradually work my way up , even though I keep yapping about Religion and Philosophy most of the time . So please pray for me . I promise you , I swear I will not succumb to Horniness , and I will treat all men,women,children and animals,and certain inanimate objects with the Total Respect . Pray for me , so that one day I can quit my job and become Super Shree Sanganak Swamy Manipal Maharaj . To SMSize it , sm42_Baba . What say you ?

P.P.S. Do think about your belief system , and compare it with others .

Sunday, January 24, 2010

How to dismantle a terrorist camp

Question : What do you get when you attack a major Indian city using 10 misled youth , take it hostage for a few days while slaughtering hundreds over the period ?

Answer : You get 11 frustrated Pakistani Cricketers , and , I still can't believe it though , a retributive Pakistani Government . "We will pay you back in kind" was what they have said .


And you get this after 1 year, 1 month and 27 days. Well, isn't payback a bitch ? :D We all must be so proud and happy that justice has been served , at last .

But the kind of sick,twisted and vindictive person I am , I am not even close to being content . I want the Lions of our GoI to ban the export of Tea and Fairness cream to Pakistan . That would be a more befitting reply . Yeah . Let those Paki's simmer for a while without fairness creams and Indian tea as well . Let's show them who has got the balls .

And if you take a few more stringent measures like these , then the giant and intricate terror breeding network , and the hate-mongering nation of Pakistan will be on its knees , gasping for a chance to participate in IPL , among many other things .

That is how you dismantle a terrorist camp , and eventually a terrorist state . :D

Thursday, January 14, 2010

Math, God and Time Travel

1 and 0.

1 is Force.

0 is energy.

They exist as 11, which is when force is in abundance, and destroys.

When energy is added to force, when zeroes are added at the end of a 1, we all know what happens. And everything can be expressed in terms of 1 and 0 .

They exist as 00, when an abundance of energy creates.

And they exist in the quantum state of 10 or 01, which their simultaneous and balanced existence, also known as the state of preservation.

When there is a balance between the two, then it is said to be in a state of preservation. The three of them co-exist, as the Trinity in Hindu Philosophy, as the 3 physical dimensions, as the biological processes of birth, life and death, and in many other unseen, unheard or inexperienced ways.

Force needs energy. It is the concentrated form of energy. Energy is channel less without force. What will energy ride, in absence of force? But what does not ride, and cannot be rode, what needs no medium, no complementing entity, is Time.

Force is 2 dimensional. It is a vector. Energy is 1 dimensional. It is a scalar. Together, they are the third dimension. Time is like the blanket wrapped around the three dimensions. It is always there, containing it all. For can you ever tell when was there no time?

Force and Energy together create what we can see, touch and hear as the 3 dimensional structures we are and contained in , and the World around us is permeated by what we cannot see, hear or touch, by what we only have a limited sense of, Time.

That’s God. And it manifests itself in so myriad ways, and that it would be foolish attempting to quantify it. And it is expressed in so many different languages, by so many different religions and is so many different shades and hues. What else can it be but God? And an Avatar of God seems to be the incarnation of a balanced form of Force and Energy. I do not know whether the physical manifestation of an Avatar can be substantiated or not, but the concept exists.

Suddenly time travel makes sense. Say, there is a very small, but very discrete unit of time. Something a lot smaller than a second, say t. Then at the end of some duration of t, something which is sort of like a snapshot of our 3 dimensional World is being saved. So, we have a super map, which contains every moment. We need to figure out how to map our sense of space and time, say 15th August, 1947 A.D. at the Red Fort, New Delhi, to find out the right co-ordinates from that super map, so that we can reach there. And this is for going back into the past. The future would be a lot more difficult, because we need to figure out the how, as well as the where, which region of the super map. Now, what all the Sci-Fi books and movies have been trying to show makes sense. :) Warp time.

Reflect on the Genius of Einstein. He gave us the equation of energy. E equals mc squared. That IS mind blowing. And theoretical explanations of time travel are supported by his theories.

What inspired what I wrote above? Flat Land. Read about it and check it on you tube. It blew me away, because may be, deep down, I am in love with Mathematics, but I just cannot express it the way Mathematicians do. And I apologize if I wasted your precious time.